The Challanges of Motherhood

Motherhood is challenging in the same way long-term unemployment is challenging. I often wondered why mothers seemed to be so frustrated all the time, but now that I have a 16 month old, I’m starting to understand. It’s a mind game.

 

For instance, just like the long-term unemployed, no matter how much effort you put in, whether it’s your resume or spending two hours planning your day to the Zoo, success is completely outside of your control. When Baby spends the whole day being miserable because you won’t let him eat bird poo and he can’t see any of the animals and he’s refusing to stay in his pram, you start to think what’s the point of even trying, Baby will have just as much fun if I throw Cornflakes all over the kitchen floor and let him loose.

Secondly, boredom. I’ve seen mothers at Shopping centres who look like they’re having about as much fun as a GWS fan at ¾ time. The reality is, you spend 12 hours a day with a person with whom you have nothing in common. You don’t love the same food, watch the same movies. I’ve never thought to myself, “I can’t wait to get to Spotlight so I can stand at the door and watch my kid sit in the silly fake bus for 20 minutes.” On top of this, you generate little, if any, income so any money spent on entertainment during the day is diluted with a little bit of guilt… and perhaps a donut to alleviate said guilt.

 

Thirdly, there’s no accountability. It doesn’t actually matter to anyone whether I showered today, or taught Baby something. I have no deadlines. There’s no way to measure whether I did a terrible job or a great job at the end of each day. And much like the long-term unemployed, no person who works wants to hear you whinge about the fact that you have nobody caring about what you did between 9 and 5 every day this week.

Then there’s your skills, and the grim reality that they’re deteriorating. How often do you find yourself thinking, “I used to be good at … (insert skill here). I used to be good at remembering the part numbers of the hundreds of stock items at work. I used to make a damn good Lamb with port and rosemary, but I’m not sure alcohol will be good for Baby’s overall health.

 

And so, I’m beginning to understand the strong desire of so many mothers to see Stay-At-Home-Mum written with capital letters, to have it as a legitimate job title when filling out forms, to call it a full-time job. Our goal-oriented self needs a purpose and a ‘job’ that we can hang our hat on at the end of each day.

Now I just need to work out why God hired me, of all people, for the job of motherhood and I’ll have this all figured out.

 

Written by Amy Moore

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